Agape Love: How true humility leads to a life of submission

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I was just studying about Peter. He is a fascinating Biblical figure. Peter was one of Jesus’s 12 disciples.  In Matthew 16: 18, Jesus said, “And I tell you that you are Peter, and on this rock I will build my church, and the gates of Hades will not overcome it.”  Peter’s name was originally Simon which means “to hear, to be heard, or reputation”.  Derived from shema meaning to hear.  The shema was recited by Jews and says, O hear O Israel, the Lord, your God is one.

Matthew 16:15-18

15 He said to them, “But who do you say that I am?”

16 Simon Peter answered and said, “You are the Christ, the Son of the living God.”

17 Jesus answered and said to him, “Blessed are you, Simon Bar-Jonah, for flesh and blood has not revealed this to you, but My Father who is in heaven. 18 And I also say to you that you are Peter, and on this rock I will build My church, and the gates of Hades shall not prevail against it.

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The word “reveal” is apokalupto in the Greek.  The word apokalupto means to take the cover off and reveal.  Jesus’s identity is like a present in a gift box.  Peter opened the box and realized that Jesus is the Christ, the Messiah, the Son of the living God. 

Every time we open the Bible with faith and expectation that we will receive revelation from the Holy Spirit, we can see another revelation of who Jesus is and who God is.

Simon Peter’s revelation that Jesus is the Messiah and the Son of the living God caused Jesus to change Simon’s name to Peter which means The Rock.  There is an actor that calls himself the rock, but he is just a copycat.  Peter was the original Rock.                                                                                                   

Peter is not just one of the twelve disciples.  Peter is one of the three disciples to get pulled away.  Peter, James, and John were often pulled aside with Jesus.  Peter is probably the oldest of the disciples.  He is the man, and he knows it.  You can see just how well he knows it here.

Matthew 26:31-35

31 Then Jesus said to them, “All of you will be [f]made to stumble because of Me this night, for it is written:

‘I will strike the Shepherd,
And the sheep of the flock will be scattered.’

32 But after I have been raised, I will go before you to Galilee.”

33 Peter answered and said to Him, “Even if all are [g]made to stumble because of You, I will never be made to stumble.”

34 Jesus said to him, “Assuredly, I say to you that this night, before the rooster crows, you will deny Me three times.”

35 Peter said to Him, “Even if I have to die with You, I will not deny You!”

And so said all the disciples

Peter is so self-confident!  Remember, that self-confident means that you are confident in yourself.  You are confident in your own abilities.  You are certain that you have the answers, the intellect, the strength, the… whatever it takes. 

Even after Jesus tells Peter that he will deny Jesus not once, but three times, Peter is still cocky and arrogant and completely full of himself in the garden when the soldiers come to arrest Jesus.

John 18:10-14

10 Then Simon Peter, having a sword, drew it and struck the high priest’s servant, and cut off his right ear. The servant’s name was Malchus.

11 So Jesus said to Peter, “Put your sword into the sheath. Shall I not drink the cup which My Father has given Me?”

12 Then the detachment of troops and the captain and the officers of the Jews arrested Jesus and bound Him. 13 And they led Him away to Annas first, for he was the father-in-law of Caiaphas who was high priest that year. 14 Now it was Caiaphas who advised the Jews that it was [a]expedient that one man should die for the people

…but later that night…

Luke 22:54-62

54 Having arrested Him, they led Him and brought Him into the high priest’s house. But Peter followed at a distance. 55 Now when they had kindled a fire in the midst of the courtyard and sat down together, Peter sat among them. 56 And a certain servant girl, seeing him as he sat by the fire, looked intently at him and said, “This man was also with Him.”

57 But he denied Him, saying, “Woman, I do not know Him.”

58 And after a little while another saw him and said, “You also are of them.”

But Peter said, “Man, I am not!”

59 Then after about an hour had passed, another confidently affirmed, saying, “Surely this fellow also was with Him, for he is a Galilean.”

60 But Peter said, “Man, I do not know what you are saying!”

Immediately, while he was still speaking, the rooster crowed. 61 And the Lord turned and looked at Peter. Then Peter remembered the word of the Lord, how He had said to him, “Before the rooster crows, you will deny Me three times.” 62 So Peter went out and wept bitterly.

Peter has always been strong, self-confident, arrogant, and proud.  He was The Rock!  After denying Jesus three times, his strength failed him.  His self-confidence was gone.  He had nothing to be arrogant or proud of.  Fear gripped him.  Shame seized him. 

Jesus is crucified.  Jesus rises from the dead.  Jesus appears to the disciples on several occasions, and on one of these occasions, we get this conversation between Peter and Jesus.

John 21:15-19

So when they had eaten breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love (agape) Me more than these?”

He said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I love (phileo) You.”

He said to him, “Feed My lambs.”

16 He said to him again a second time, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love (agape) Me?”

He said to Him, “Yes, Lord; You know that I love (phileo) You.”

He said to him, “Tend My sheep.”

17 He said to him the third time, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love (phileo) Me?” Peter was grieved because He said to him the third time, “Do you love (phileo) Me?”

And he said to Him, “Lord, You know all things; You know that I love (phileo) You.”

Jesus said to him, “Feed My sheep. 18 Most assuredly, I say to you, when you were younger, you girded yourself and walked where you wished; but when you are old, you will stretch out your hands, and another will gird you and carry you where you do not wish.” 19 This He spoke, signifying by what death he would glorify God. And when He had spoken this, He said to him, “Follow Me.”

Agape love is love, charity, or lay down your life kind of love. We can see this in John 15:13 where agape love is described.

13 Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends.

Phileo love is (Philadelphia) brotherly love or love you like a brother.

So Peter and Jesus are having this conversation, and this is what is really looks like in the Greek.  Jesus asks Peter if he has agape, lay your life down kind of love, for him.  Peter says I have phileo, brotherly love, for Jesus.  Jesus tells him to feed his lambs.  Then Jesus asks Peter again if Peter has agape, lay your life down kind of love, for him.  Peter is like no.  I once thought I had agape, lay your life down kind of love, for you, but that was tested, and I failed the test.  Peter is saying, I now know that all I have inside of me in phileo, brotherly love, for you, Jesus.  I am ashamed, but this is all that I have in me.  Jesus says to Peter to tend his sheep.  Jesus asks Peter a third time, but this time, he asks Peter if he has phileo or brotherly love for Christ.  Peter answers saying that Jesus knows all things.  Jesus knows that Peter failed the agape, lay your life down kind of love, test.  Jesus knows that Peter feels like all he is capable of is phileo or brotherly love.  Jesus replies with “Feed my sheep.” 

Peter at one time was convinced he had agape (lay your life down kind of love) love for Jesus, but when it was tested, and he thought he might actually have to lay down his life for knowing Jesus, he denied knowing Jesus proving to himself that he only had phileo (brotherly love) love for Jesus.  This humbled Peter is a far cry from the disciple who declared in Matthew 26:33 that even if all fall away, he never will.  This humbled Peter is a far cry from the brute who cut the servant’s ear in the garden in John 18:10-15  This humbled Peter is ready to be a shepherd to Christ’s flock.

Jesus doesn’t need strong, self-confident, arrogant, and proud servants.  Jesus needs humble servants who are completely dependent on God, self-sacrificing individuals who knows that all strength worth having comes from God, all knowledge worth having comes from God, that everything worth having comes from God and God alone.  Servants who have agape love… the lay down your life kind of love.  God is looking for servants who are willing to lay down their lives, to lay down their own desires, to lay down their hopes, to lay down their dreams, to lay down their aspirations, to lay down their own ideas, to lay down everything for God.  But it wasn’t over for Peter.  Did you catch the end of the verses we read above?

John 21:18-19

18 Most assuredly, I say to you, when you were younger, you girded yourself and walked where you wished; but when you are old, you will stretch out your hands, and another will gird you and carry you where you do not wish.” 19 This He spoke, signifying by what death he would glorify God. And when He had spoken this, He said to him, “Follow Me.”

Jesus is telling Peter here that it’s not over, and that Peter will most assuredly get to demonstrate agape love for Jesus because Peter would stretch out his hands and die on a cross like Jesus.  Peter did eventually get to demonstrate that lay down your life kind of love for Christ in the most powerful way.

Today, people struggle to come to church service once a week, to read their Bible on a regular basis, to pray, to intercede for others, to forgive, to love, to talk to others about Jesus.  People often aren’t willing to sacrifice an extra hour of sleep much less their lives. 

But we are all called to have agape love, the lay your life down for Christ kind of love.  That means that we have to get serious about God and the things of God.  That means we have to get serious about helping others to get serious about God and the things of God.  That means that we have to keep opening the Word of God to reveal as much about the nature of God as we can possibly learn so that we have it in us to pour out to others.  Fervent study of the Bible coupled with passionate regular prayer ensures us that we will be well equipped to carry out any sacrifice that might be required of us.

About Trisha

Trisha Kilpatrick is a homeschooling mother of three. She has a degree in Education with a double major in Elementary and Special Education, but she is more proud of her countless hours of volunteer work in Children's Church. She believes that all children can learn and that, in life, simple is almost always best. *Affiliate links are used on this site. I may be compensated when you click on or buy from these links. If you have any questions, you can contact me at questions@trishadishes.com .

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